How do you see yourself? No, it’s not the question they ask you in the interview. How do you really see yourself? Who are we?
Do you see yourself as a very important person? Or you think you are important but people don’t value that.
Do you think that people underestimate your potentials? Do they overshadow your efforts? Why does it happen to you?
How do we define our identity? How do we portray ourselves in our own mind? Or how do we interact with different people?
We adjust ourselves according to the situation. We adjust ourselves to who we are with. You are a different person with your friends, you a different person with your family, you are a different person with your colleagues.
On social media, we have the control over how we offer ourselves to the world. We have the control over how we sell ourselves.
Our perfectly edited Instagram posts, our Facebook profiles pictures, our WhatsApp stories with deep meaning are the way how we get to define that how other people will interpret you.
Everything mentioned above leads to one question.
Who are we?
In the Shots of Awe, Jason Silva mentions Philosopher Cooley’s looking glass self theory. Which says we make mental modeling of other people’s mind.
In his words, you are not what you think you are, you are not who other people think you are, you are what you think what other people think you are.
Read that again.
Confused? Well, this is how it is.
We assume what other people think of us. We see ourselves from the eyes of other. We look at ourselves by making assumptions of what other people think of us.
But we never actually get to know what other people think, we get to know only what we imagine what other people think about us.
In the end we live in our self made imaginary world. And it becomes the inception of fake reality. It distract you in the present, and in the future makes you think I wish I could change the past. And questions who are we?
But the truth is, you are what you think you are.
Not any other person, not other people. You are what you think you are.
In the book The Magic of Thinking Big author David Schwartz mentions, If you think you are important, other people will think you are important.
Your thinking or how you think determines how you act. Your thinking affect how do you act. Your mind reflects in your actions. How you act determines how other peoples react to you.
So your actions becomes important. That’s why your thinking determines how other people treat you.
Here is an example, do you respect that young perfectly healthy guy who sleeps on road, begs for living, but does not have any enthusiasm for work?
Why? Because he doesn’t respect himself. He is letting himself rot away from lack of self respect.
Self respect shines in everything we do.
Look important because it helps you to think that you are important. Your appearance talk to you but also it talks to others.
It says that look at someone’s intelligence not at their appearance. But people do judge you from your appearance. It’s the first evaluation people have about you.
People look at someone, make a quick subconscious appraisal, and then treat them accordingly.
A well dressed man will be respected in public places instead of a guy who is wearing some fancy shoes and fancy jeans. Though the same person wears different outfit, the appearance does matter.
A well appearance says positive things. When we look at someone well dressed we think positively about him. He looks intelligent, a confident man. He can be trustworthy and dependable.
He respects himself and I respect him.
On other hand, the same same guy with fancy outfit. What would you think about him?
People treat you from your actions. And your actions are controlled by your thoughts.
Again, You are what you think you are.
Why many people stays at only one level? Their thinking keeps them there.
A person who thinks his job is important, receives mental signals on how to do his job better. And there is need to explain what a better job is.
Think you’re weak, think you lack what it takes, think you will lose, and you are deteriorated to become an average.
But think instead, I am important. I do have what it takes. My work is important. Think this way and you’re headed straight to success.
But how to do that? Author David Schwartz explains, give yourself a pep talk several times a day.
To be on the top you have got to feel on the top. Get a self pep talk and see.
People might laugh.
Please! Don’t accept the judgement of average people. You are not average.